As we’ve stated over and over and over again I am a sentimental sap who has a difficult time with change and is constantly overwhelmed with nostalgia. This morning as I am cuddled up in my flannel blanket pumping myself up to run along (up and down the rollercoaster size mountains) hills of north San Diego county I can’t help but reminisce about the era that is ending.
At 6 am every morning I read Hungry Runner Girl’s blog. This morning she was talking about being happy even when times are tough. She naturally was comparing it to running. As I was thinking about the hard times in my life, at least for the past 4 or 5 years, there has been one person who has been there, laughed at my ridiculousness, and helped me up when I was down. He and I together figured out and decided that by golly there is an amazing world out there and we are going to enjoy it. You can read more about it here, here, here, here, here, here or here. (It was hard to limit it to 7 posts)
Like any good era, this era is coming to an end. Life has changed, we have changed, and our best friends have changed. It’s ok. It’s good. It’s natural. But that doesn’t mean I am not sad. In an attempt to comfort me in my years of being single my dad would often tell me I will look back at my single years with fondness. Honestly, I don’t know if that will ever be true, and I have an embarrassing amount of journal entries to remind me if I ever happen to forget, but I do know that I will look back at the time I got to be best friends with Lars as some of the happiest experiences of my life. Why? Because he was there. No matter how sad, ridiculous, or straight up embarrassing, he was there.
He was there when I was in grad school and working full time and I barely had the energy to get out of bed let alone clean my room, take care of dirty dishes, or do my laundry….. what did he do? He set up a projector in my living room and told me it was perfectly okay to watch 12 hours straight of 24 just to escape life for a day.
He was there when I got the phone call from my old best friend that they were going to have a baby. (Well technically I was on a run around the Rose Parade route but…) He understood that when he asked about my run and I melted to the floor and cried in fetal position and his cute German roommate said, “uhhhhhh, I go get some tea.” That I was crying because I wanted a baby too….
He was there when he made me laugh so hard at Disneyland that I peed my pants right in front of everyone trying to enter the Haunted Mansion. Yes. It’s true. Legs crossed, drops coming down from my skirt for the whole world to see. He horrified, naturally, almost picked me up and carried me to the bathroom and made everyone there swear to never repeat this story ever…..
In a period of time that it felt like everyone was leaving, everyone was growing, everyone was changing he was there. No judgment, or critical remarks, just there.So why am I sad as I sit here and type? Because like so many other times in life I know it’s an end of an era. It’s a happy thing really. We don’t need each other like we did the past 4 years. It was a rough time for the both of us. But the great news is we survived, and by golly we are better because of it.
|Yes, this picture is blurry (very art-zy) and my hair is a wreck from Splash Mt earlier that day.)|